Batavia:
An officer stopped a vehicle that was weaving on Clinton Street. The driver, an Alden woman, was showing signs of intoxication and could not locate her license though she was holding it in her hand. She placed the license into a pack of cards and began to look for it again. She also had to be told numerous times to put down her cell phone, as she kept initiating calls and ignoring the officer. When asked how much she had to drink, she replied, “one gallon of wine today.”
Brooklyn:
A Harrison Avenue resident reported a man walking through several gardens and back yards. When questioned by police, the man claimed to be heading home, walking through the lawns because God wanted him to clean up the Earth.
Buffalo:
A Harlem Road woman reported that an acquaintance stole her 2008 Pontiac. The culprit had driven her home in her car the night before because she was drunk. The complainant did not know the suspect’s name.
Queens:
While on patrol, officers observed three individuals entering yards as they walked along Center Road. They appeared to be intoxicated and gave conflicting stories as to why they were walking in people’s yards, including that they were looking at deer, jumping over a ditch and heard a dog barking. One of the individuals began using obscene language. He fought with the officer as he was being placed in the patrol car and said, “Go ahead, mace me.” The officer complied.
Staten Island:
Police responded to a report of criminal mischief on Seneca Street after a caller reported that her vehicle window was smashed and the culprit could be someone who is harassing her son. Patrol determined footprints around the car may have been the complainant’s. The caller then stated that she may have been dreaming.
Monday, June 1, 2009
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Minnesota
Apple Valley:
Suspicious socks. An officer responded to a call to a residence whose owner told the officer that he found a pair of women's socks between the cushions of his couch that don't belong to any of his family members. He said he has been finding things in his couch over the last two years that don't belong to his family, and his wife says she doesn't know anything about it. He wants to start reporting this to police.
Chaska:
Miscellaneous. A woman from Drexel Avenue in Jordan brought an artillery shell from the World War II era to the Chaska Police Department. She had found it in a box in the garage of her home and wanted to know how to dispose of it. The shell appeared to be unspent and the primer was still intact. Due to the unknown condition of the device, an officer from the Bloomington Police Department bomb squad responded and took possession of the device. The officer indicated the shell was likely still live.
Edina:
Theft. A rabbit lawn ornament was stolen from the 3700 block of West 61st Street. A ransom note was left in the victim's mailbox.
Minnetrista:
Civil dispute. A 17-year-old boy from the 900 block of Pheasant Lane called police to say his father was depriving him of his cell phone. The boy left his cell phone at his grandfather's house and wanted his father to pick it up. The father refused. It was determined to be a civil issue.
Suspicious socks. An officer responded to a call to a residence whose owner told the officer that he found a pair of women's socks between the cushions of his couch that don't belong to any of his family members. He said he has been finding things in his couch over the last two years that don't belong to his family, and his wife says she doesn't know anything about it. He wants to start reporting this to police.
Chaska:
Miscellaneous. A woman from Drexel Avenue in Jordan brought an artillery shell from the World War II era to the Chaska Police Department. She had found it in a box in the garage of her home and wanted to know how to dispose of it. The shell appeared to be unspent and the primer was still intact. Due to the unknown condition of the device, an officer from the Bloomington Police Department bomb squad responded and took possession of the device. The officer indicated the shell was likely still live.
Edina:
Theft. A rabbit lawn ornament was stolen from the 3700 block of West 61st Street. A ransom note was left in the victim's mailbox.
Minnetrista:
Civil dispute. A 17-year-old boy from the 900 block of Pheasant Lane called police to say his father was depriving him of his cell phone. The boy left his cell phone at his grandfather's house and wanted his father to pick it up. The father refused. It was determined to be a civil issue.
Mission: Amusement
Police blotters can be funny. Police blotters can also be frightening. Police blotters are usually filled with repeated listings of different individuals leaving their vehicles unlocked and having their crap stolen from them. This can make finding the funny a tedious process. Let me find the funny, the weird, and the downright baffling for you.
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